I heard a nice little story the other day, and even though it digresses from the subject of today’s entry, I thought that I might share it with you.

A dear friend of mine – a very caring lady, by the way – was speaking about her daughter who had recently given birth to a healthy baby boy.

The newborn developed what sounded like a velvety wheeze, and the new mum wasn’t sure if she should err on the side of caution and take the baby to the hospital.

My friend’s candid response to her daughter’s query went something like this: “What do you think will happen?”

It wasn’t the response I was anticipating.  It may not have been the response that her daughter was anticipating, either.

To my great surprise, it was the answer that put both her daughter and me at ease.

Knowing how to ask intelligent questions that help during difficult moments makes this woman an exceptional mother, grandmother and friend.

I don’t have a natural segue from this story to my entry for today.  So, let’s turn quickly to the question at hand:  how can you fix grammar mistakes that you don’t even realize you’re making?

Based on the classroom evidence that I’ve gathered over time, I think that I’ve narrowed it down to three steps.

You’ll be happy to read that no great feats of memory are required, although each of the three steps do require a healthy dollop of courage.

The first thing you should do is get real-time feedback.

Find generous people who believe that brains can change – at any age.

These individuals will not sugar coat their comments.

They will have (or they will find) the right words to tell you where you’ve gone wrong, and they will guide you and support you during your moments of heightened awareness.

Try joining a writer’s group or a conversation club.  Seek out new resources and new mentors because this is where you will learn new things.

The next step is perhaps the most difficult.  It has to do with avoiding reality.

Everyone carries around the feeling that they know what they know – until, that is, they don’t really; then, it’s too late to avoid public embarrassment.

The worst thing that an emerging bilingual or multilingual learner can do is stick their head in the sand and ignore the feedback and new information that they’ve received, opting to “get by” without it.

Once the real-time feedback is received, something has to be done with it.

That takes us to step number three: time to roll up your sleeves and get to work.

Lasting change requires disciplined flexibility.

It requires the boring, day-in and day-out commitment to reading, writing, speaking and listening and, of course, making plenty of mistakes along the way.

It requires opening your mind as much as it will allow you.

These suggestions are not designed for the lily-livered.

But if you decide to take that first step, what do you think will happen?